asmywitness | IC Inbox

[Extremely unfortunate for her. She doesn't notice his movement at the very least, focusing more on trying to calm herself down and find some sort of center. This is absolutely fine, she's safe here. There's no reason to be acting like this.

She's closing her eyes tightly, taking a deep and shaky breath before that hand is on her back and she near jumps out of her skin at the contact. The first instinct to move away but not finding the actual effort to do so. But the jump is obvious enough and her pulling away even more so.

With another shaky breath she's shifting again to bury her face in her knees. Perhaps not the best of moments.]

[As soon as Lydia jumps he yanks his hand away in a sharp flinch of his own, and immediately curses himself. Idiot, if she's freaking out of course she won't want touch.

He immediately pushes himself away fully, and in fact clambers off the bed completely to go to their wardrobe. He's very insistent about hanging things up so he knows exactly where one of her fluffy robes is, so he can bring it back and drape it gently in front of her, so she knows it's there and has something to comfort her that's not him.

He's not leaving he just doesn't know what to do.]

[If she noticed him moving, she's not indicating it. And, really, she's too focused in her own mind to notice much of anything. Her senses aren't anywhere near as strong as they would be anywhere but here, reduced to levels that still irritate her when it comes up.

Shifting a brief moment she catches the sight of the fluffy robe set in front of her and quickly takes it and wriggles around to curl up in it. Deep breaths, right. Right.

Okay.

There's nothing that should be setting this off here, it was... just a dream she'd rather not relive again, one of the rare times she does have anything resembling a dream.

Finally she looks up again, to look for him. And the briefest of signs.]

Sorry.

[He hasn't moved from standing beside her, but when she acknowledges him he signs back first--]

It's alright.

[--before he sits in front of her on the bed. Close enough that she can reach out if she does want the touch, but far enough that he's not immediately doing so.]

Nightmare?

[It's appreciated, the little thoughts there. She's not too keen on contact right now, given everything, but she doesn't seem to have a problem with him sitting in front of her at least.]

To... say the very least. [She pauses for a moment in her words, chewing on her lower lip as she debates what else to say.]

It's something that happened a long time ago, I didn't think it'd pop up again.

Is... do you want to talk about it?

[That's the thing they're trying to do, right? Actually talk about their shit?]

It's fine if you don't, I just. Figured I should ask.

[Actually talking about their shit like normal people, yeah. Though she hadn't really thought this shit was remotely relevant since her past is dumb and doesn't mean much in this particular time period.]

You really want to know? In hindsight it's... kind of dumb. Especially with how I've been acting here anyway.

I probably should, in case something happens worse than a nightmare. Off days happen.

[As evidenced by her waking him up with a nightmare at all.]

[That doesn't really make her feel better! She's visibly huffing and burying her face for a moment, mostly due to how stupid she feels about the whole thing.

Right. She can. Probably sort of explain. Even thought she's not looking up yet.]

I might have mentioned, even how off-handed, that the whole... targeting people and making some questionable business decisions that result in the exchange of currency afterward was not my first time doing so. Things are a little... different when it's for your and your brothers' survival and you're really barely an adult, if that. And they know that. I never was a very physically dependent type. [She's not sure if any of that makes sense, but it's in her nature to dance around the damn bush like this. Even as she shifts to rest her cheek on a knee to finally watch him properly again.]

[Tyler is very good at reading between the lines. And he definitely gets, rather all of a sudden, that Lydia's past is a lot more complicated than just "high fantasy, lost my brother and became a lich".]

Right. Yeah, I've definitely heard that tale before, in so many words. That must have been hard.

[A lot more complicated than that, she's just, usually, really good at hiding the majority of it. Easier to be simple than to be complicated, isn't it?

Though she seems to relax, somewhat, at his reply.]

In mild terms, yes. Pretty much, well, everything had been difficult until we'd picked up on illusion magic. Relying on someone who absolutely was not remotely prepared to handle themself much less three damned children also certainly didn't help. [And were, probably, primarily unwanted but she's not going to get into that as it's not even a detail she's sure about, herself.]

Unfortunately, it wasn't a terribly uncommon occurrence, being shoved out into the world via whatever means to try and survive in whatever way you could. Whether it be the result of a war or just in the wrong place at the wrong time.

[Tyler is finding himself very thankful that all he had to do was be a third parent, and not out on the damn streets.]

Geeze. That's one hell of a start in life.

[She slowly shrugs, attention shifting towards just some point on the wall in front of her. Easier this way.]

I suppose she tried her best with what she had, given she had to do it by herself. And it was hardly her fault when sickness came to claim her. [She's actually glad this is through sign and not voice, otherwise the bitterness in tone would be clear as day.]

But... yeah, I'm sure you can... guess about why that particular bit might have caused that reaction. [No reason to be straightforward about it, no reason to make things harder than they have to be. That was centuries ago and none of them would have been alive still, anyway, as far as she's aware. And even then she's here now, so it's a moot point...]

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